Art After Dark: Baloney, Emily Dickinson Eating Cookies, and Vampire Costumed Rock and Roll

“Art After Dark” at the Speed Museum in Louisville was a lively scavenger-hunt of an event. To look at the schedule, broken down into subcategories including music and performance, was to feel inadequately singular. There was just no way to see even most of what was on offer. Art? No. Baloney!

And maybe that was the point. It is far better to have too much than too little at a shindig like this. Nobody would want to actually look at the art… .

Anyway, let’s cut to the high points:

  • $27 Artworks donated by locals
  • Baloney in clear plastic bags
  • Le Petomane Theatre Ensemble with cookies
  • Wax Fang in a costumed rockandroll show

So the museum invited local artists to contribute works of art to sell for $27. Cute idea? Sure.

Or was the whole thing just salt in the wounds of artists who’ve long complained that the Speed fails to support local arts, and then exploits them when need be?

Anyway, some artists decided to make a point and instead of donating work they sent in slices of baloney. You get the picture.

So did I. I really loved the paper sign advising visitors to not touch the art. Charming memory.

The Speed was sharp enough to exhibit all the baloney that they got on a couple of walls, and they listed them as for sale just like the rest of the art. My baloney has a first name: It's A-R-T
There were a couple of good pieces of $27 work, but most looked like cheap bad art. I can’t help but think that’s part of the fun. And I have to admire the artists who looked at the whole thing as a commission and spent 10 minutes or whatever and just tossed something together and still had it turn out wonderfully. That’s what I call talent. Not skill, but talent.

Wandering the first floor a bit (searching for a gallery that I forgot was upstairs–and the lack of reminders or maps was odd…) it was hard to miss the large flat-panel displays that were playing flip-films created by crowdsource and provided courtesy of our Louisville Film Society. The group invited anyone interested to borrow a flip-cam from the Speed and capture a short film. Submissions were due Monday and would guarantee 2 free tickets to the event. [I didn't have time, or I would have made one. I'd even planned it all out, though I'll never tell what I planned!]

Some of them were great, but for the small number of screens available, each film should have been limited to 2 or 3 minutes instead of the rambling unedited 10 minutes that many of the films ran, bloating the playlist of each screen into the “maybe I’ll check back later” category. It was fun, though, and interesting to see how volunteers responded to the prompt of “Moving.”

Throughout the evening the theatre troupe Le Petomane perfomed short bits of original work(s?). The piece in the tapestry gallery was a crafty, elevated (literally, on both counts) accounting of the poet Emily Dickinson. Abigail Maupin played the poetess at her most impolitest: riding the shoulders of Tony Dingman and holding forth in a voice muffled–though sweetened–by the cookie she was eating. It seemes like some of the crowd didn’t know what to make of it. Perhaps these folks were confused by the acoustics of the rooms and the fluidity of the ensemble’s “stage” boundaries, but it is, in the audience’s defense perhaps challenging to walk in on some non-traditional theatre already in progress.

The cookies at the end of this one, distributed via dangling red basket, helped smooth things over, though, especially with the kiddies.

Finally, the night ended with a show by glam/jam/indie rockers Wax Fang in the tapestry gallery. They came out in Louis XVI costumes complete with wigs, powdered faces, and livid red glittery lipstick. Again, there was some confusion in the audience as people seemed confused by the relatively conservative sonics of the act’s set.

I compare the experience of listening to the set to that of watching vampire extras from a cheesy movie production who’ve decided to kill time by playing gothic, meandering versions of a band’s best material. All of that, of course, taking place inside a rug factory. And the band members mouths made up to look like they’d feasted on babies swaddled in Fat Elvis’s sequined bellbottoms. It was quite a bit of fun, but strange too on account of the crowd. Nothing like the reported flannel-fest at Zanzibar for the band The Whigs on the same night.

In all, a lively, well-attended fun time at the area’s big art museum. I’m certain they got many new members onto the museum’s rolls and helped remind a lot of the community that Louisville arts aren’t limited to the performing ones. (Though it doesn’t hurt to blend it all up sometimes.)

But the tricky thing with trying to offer something for everyone was that attendees were as likely puzzled by what they accidentally came across as they were pleased by what they were already expecting.

Twitter Week 2010-02-02

  • RT @WaldenTheatre: After The Crucible tonight, walk/sled over to The Late Seating @ATLouisville. (1-inch snowferno permitting, of course.) #
  • Late Seating's looking good. Maybe I'll meet some of you twitter people. Warning: you might have to convince me that you're real… #
  • Do we give up on Spirit Rover on Mars? (on @scifri) Could still do some really cool science! #
  • Maybe while Spirit cools it's wheels it will photograph the elusive #MartianYeti #
  • Whoa, did anyone else hear about the Haydn Opera at the Hayden Planetarium on @scifri this afternoon? How cool is that! http://is.gd/7jcKP #
  • If i had skis i would totally let the dogs pull me forever. Perfect day to shout "Mush!" #
  • Is jogging to the vet's office for cat meds a good idea, or should I just hike it and get really bundled up? #
  • BBC just referred to Punxsatawney Phil as "A type of marmot believed to predict the weather." #
  • BBC just floated the idea of a robotic alternative to the groundhog. OMG #
  • I think that's called "Chuck E Cheese" #
  • Man, those Brits! First they want our health care system, now they want to set up w/ PETAs help) a manchurian groundhog in Punxsatawney, PA. #
  • Make millions keywords SEO social! media! to sell sales widgets prospective client to follow list tweet? lost sex superbowl grammys #sellout #
  • <now waiting for the droves of followers> #

Twitter Week 2010-01-26

  • RT @gbullard LBJ: "…leave me about an inch from where the zipper [belch] ends around under my… back to my…" http://is.gd/6DKPO #
  • White guy in front row snapping spastically off-rhythm w/ the black opera singers at tonight's cocktail arts org event? Yeah, still funny. #
  • I should note that the rhythmless white guy wasn't me. Jeez. Unlike him, I have both self-restraint and an intact sense of rhythm. #
  • Sometimes I'm surprised that white people can even chew, they have such bad rhythm. Really, it's just appalling. #
  • Sorry, not all. Just the ones who think they're feeling it but are feeling something else that is clearly not it. #
  • Redundant=$20 dollars is redundant #
  • Next marshmallow in Lucky Charms: should it be a rabbit's foot or @Fairdalebigfoot ? Marshmallows made of cow feet… so are they lucky too? #
  • I don't want to use Foursquare unless it can identify where my mind wanders when I should be paying attention. #
  • RT @WaldenTheatre: The Crucible, 7:30, MeX Theatre at Kentucky Center. McCarthyism via the Pilgrims. Still relevant? You betcha. (Please RT) #
  • #FF @NHmag Great source for info about the mag & media biz from students & instructors at Newhouse School. A great companion to @romenesko #
  • Lipstick on a pig? Its still lipstick. #
  • Hanging posters Monday for upcoming shows @WaldenTheatre (So many options for lunch/coffee!) Saw The Crucible on Sat. for free. Love my job. #
  • Only possible reason for foursquare: to collect/sell geohabits of digerati to advertisers or ANYONE who'll buy. Too sketchy, I withdraw. #
  • Man, my grad program was/IS awesome. RT @JohannaKeller: Goldring arts journalists go to Charleston for Spoleto Festival:http://is.gd/72Y7B #

Twitter Week 2010-01-19

  • New faucet installed and ball valve replaced. I must be growing up. #
  • Is there a nice way to call something goblin-spawned eye-clawing evil or do we just call it Ringo w/ Ben Harper on last night's Daily Show? #
  • Laser day on science friday! #
  • Are most people off work on MLK? I'm working. I didn't even know anyone but schools got off for it before last Thursday… retail ruined me. #

Do You Label Everything? Labeling is Not a Pastime.

It’s important to label items so that you can easily find something again or otherwise return to a place you are. Now, how vital is it to label something as something it is clearly not?
Image087
If someone went around labeling walls as doors, that would be funny. When Magritte labeled his painting of a pipe “Ceci ne pas un pipe” he was saying that this painted pipe is not a pipe at all and was also asking questions of the art world that it was not ready to answer at the time (and which is probably still isn’t, or isn’t interested in anymore, at least).

So, what do you make of this (last seen prowling the Louisville Highlands Kroger)?

This goes right up there with the little Braille pads beside the exit doors of very large rooms reading “Fire Exit” or, alternately, “Not an Exit.”

Throwing Money Down the Drain?

Selling fundamentals 101 says (and of course I’m winging it here), “Identifying the problem is the first step to pitching a product that will fix it.”

Okay. Snuggie commercials show people writhing in agony because they chose a towel-sized shred of fabric for a sofa blanket. Their legs churn like those of sleeping dogs dreaming of squirrels. They toss and turn. They can’t cover their arms and still cover their legs and they wouldn’t even dream of snacking on popcorn at the same time.

But a Snuggie is a huge, sleeved, backwards-robe-of-a-sofa-throw that is the fabric incarnation of the Hindu god Xanax. Delight, warmth, and popcorn. You can even be old and enjoy a Snuggie.

Image093
Bear with me–this is just getting good.

I remember, years ago, an art history lecture on contemporary art (with UofL’s brilliantly digressive Jay Kloner) that touched on consumerism. We were talking about  Jeff Koons and James Rosenquist and maybe Andy Warhol’s Brillo Box. Then we were talking about GE’s lightbulbs (you know they must be able to make longer-lasting bulbs, yet they keep us in CHAINS!) and finally we get to baking soda.

You see, there was a time when baking soda was used almost exclusively for baking and cooking. Problem was, the industry was flat. How do you sell more of the stuff?

Then came refrigerators and someone in a certain industry convinced us that these refrigerators stank and that only the remarkable odor-capturing qualities of baking soda would save us from the embarrassment of Funky Fridge during cocktail parties. Next thing we know we’re putting baking soda in every room of the house, in every closet, cabinet, and shoe rack. Need better results? We make sure to replace each box once a month.

Lesson: a flat-sales industry can remake itself as a good subscription service. Kinda scarry.

The real coup, though, was convincing us that our kitchen drains harbored dreadful malodorous fumes. Solution: Buy baking soda, bring it home, and immediately POUR IT DOWN YOUR DRAIN! That is a winner.

The box (pictured at the top) is a veritable Wheaties box showing a big daddy among advertising success stories. The copy on the box reminds us that there are hundreds of uses, but follows that statement with a “:” and then a kitchen sink with a nimbus of holiness. There might be hundreds of ways to use this product, but wouldn’t you rather just throw it away?

Kudos, Arm and Hammer, for having the stones to remind us that yes, you won a long time ago. We consumers are ever your thralls.

Twitter Week 2010-01-12

  • Still dizzy all day after #Bachelor twitterrant last night. Treatment: parcheesi w/ Niki & good book (Sharp Teeth) & hot tea & 1980s R.E.M. #
  • Word of the day: automagically. As in the way that IT people say non-IT people think that IT works. (Thx @ahuff01) #
  • Another homemade avocado-carrot-friedtofu sushi night. Five mammoth rolls for $5 worth of ingredients & totally easy from scratch. Amazing. #
  • Oops, forgot the Tofu. Sans fu it's $5, avec fu it's $6.50. Price in ANY restuarant (for smaller rolls, at that) $30-46. Make time: 45 min. #
  • Hope this disc golf injury clears up, gotta use this shoulder for tennis. Yeah I said disc golf injury. Ya think thats real funny, huh? #
  • Louisville colder than Syracuse. As long as spring arrives in Lou before June I won't complain. Syr winter ate my summer 2009–im still mad. #

Twitter Week 2010-01-05

  • Taking suggestions for primary mix drink for our New Years Eve party. Collins/sour? Tequila sunrise/margarita? Boring Moe-heeto? Tell me! #
  • I think I'm going w/ brandy. Anyone wanna join me for a happy hour sidecar or stinger on Weds? You know, try before I buy. Oh, but where? #
  • Weird. I'm a Local Luminary like @michellej and @gbullard. Do I get a designated parking spot @highlandcoffee for this? http://is.gd/5GWgB #
  • The Dude abides. Lingering doubts about the legitimacy of Lebowski-craze made to look silly in NYT: http://is.gd/5H7E9 #
  • Sushi, pigs in snuggies, nobakes, artichoke dip, chocopretzels coming soon. Party prep in full stretch. #
  • bueno new yeargrog grog grog #
  • Thank you Dick Clark for waking up & putting on the show of your career. I know you're not frozen. Thanks for keeping real for us. #
  • RT @ArtQA: Saw McDonald's TV spot where Ronald fills a dark sky with stars for some kids. Ronald McDonald is now a deity? Pretty audacious. #
  • Loony Toons marathon on Cartoon Network. Thank you television. #
  • Delicious soup, grilled cheese, and friends. Then Bugs Bunny. Really this is the best New Year's Day ever. And no dogs, very peaceful. #
  • Another game penned into Bluegrass State basketball history. Mightve been different had that UK kid been ejected for terrible elbow shot. #
  • Clean house is strangely unfriendly without comforting piles of random stuff on all surfaces. It's like motel art. Soulless, boring, fake. #
  • Sharp Teeth by Toby Barlow: Free-verse epic about packs of Southern California lycanthrope criminals + detective + dogcatcher. So good. #
  • The Bachelor isn't always this shallow, is it? Even if it was, these women were built (literally constructed) to recalibrate the scale. #
  • She's in love with him already. Oh my goodness! #
  • The producers should have just thrown rocks at this guy. Would've made the same impact. And might've sanded off his squareness, too. #
  • The set looks like the Garden of Eden. But Eve has been replaced by snakes and they forgot that there's a tree of knowledge. #bachelor #
  • A girl just invited him to land his plane on her landing strip any time. Is she a member of a cargo cult? #bachelor #
  • Just to let everyone know, I'm not watching #bachelor. Niki's watching it. I'm playing Statler and Waldorf on the Muppet Show #
  • Niki just pointed to one of the women and said "She's a man." Dude, that is ICE COLD! #bachelor #
  • I totally ove the 4-second LOST preview/commercials during #bachelor. I thought that dude was dead. Huh. #
  • #Bachelor just said, "This is so real." #
  • OOh! The #Bachelor is gonna end up on a pirate ship!!! I'm going to wait until that one to watch again. #
  • So, grocery or stick around for Conveyor Belt of Love? (For those not watching, that is actually the title of the show after The #Bachelor.) #

Twitter Week 2009-12-29

  • Artists in captivity: RT @ebertchicago: Did dolphins teach themselves to do this? The rascals are always up to something. http://j.mp/8ohSKe #
  • RT @mno608: via @markobbie: Golf Digest inches away from Tiger, but hes still on the masthead as "playing editor." Heh. http://bit.ly/79HtKu #
  • As soon as I finish filling out this Junior-AARP application, I'm going to watch Matlock on hulu. #
  • Genuine Muppetskin houseshoes. So smart & supple. Jessica Simpson (brand in pic 2) knows her luxury. http://is.gd/5zjc1 #
  • Since when does spinach—baby spinach—register a 4outa5 on a flavor scale?! Betcha this taster doesn't go out for Indian. http://is.gd/5zjJ2 #
  • Cardinals are at Freedom Hall tonight. U of L announcer: "Almost every game they've played here has been at home." #
  • My wife had the most Jewish xmas a non-Jew can have: Sleep in, matinee, Indian food, and hot chocolate at home w/ non-Jewish husband Isaac. #
  • Sure wish there were an indian ice cream shop around here. #
  • Actually that indian bodega at Bonnycastle has an icecream case, but it houses glass pipes & bongs not delicious sugared frozen milkfat. #
  • Pigs in a snuggie =*THE* novelty fingerfood of New Year's Eve at Isaac & Niki's gettogether this year. (Tweeps welcome. DM for directions). #
  • Never seen a guy get so pumped about a label maker but @bizarobot is full of surprises/enthusiasm & in possession of well-preserved classic. #

Twitter Week 2009-12-22

  • Bring me some figgy pudding, punk. #
  • Wanna help ring in the New Year? Come to our "Dick Clark's New Year's Cryogenic Y2K+10 Eve." Should be mildly amusing. http://is.gd/5qFwL #
  • gabebullard: http://tumblr.com/xvk4qutfr #
  • Get ready for cataclysm this New Year! What, didn't anyone warn you that 2010 is the new 2012? #
  • I almost like VampWknd. But I'm mostly uninterested. What else is out there? Suggestions anyone? Should I buy the new Chipmunks soundtrack? #
  • RT @ArtQA: Black woman w/ blackpower afro picks (PW cover) is smart art about power of ideas. But waaay controversial. http://is.gd/5rkaW #
  • Dick Clark is the original Ice Ice Baby. #
  • Expect a run on coonskin hats- folks will want to look their best for the oneday bear hunt in eastern Kentucky. So weird. #
  • Coonskin hats off (along w/ everything else) for the great Kentucky bare hunt! Just like our pioneer nudist founders used to do. #
  • Outlet shopping: saving money needn't be so intellectually subtractive or fuel intensive. #
  • It feels like a weekday, except for all the drinking. #

Twitter Feed

  • Jackie Green speaks with great earnestness. I think he overprepared by accumulating artificial gravity on his way in from outer space. 6 hrs ago
  • "Art$=jobs" banner in the crowd. Yes i am in their number. 6 hrs ago
  • Tyler Allen spouting creative class platitudes and saying nothing? No way! 7 hrs ago
  • More updates...